Saturday, February 10, 2018

Tinder - 100 Proof Gambling

I'm not going to lie. This is a profile that came up while I was traveling but it stood out to me because it made me angry from the guy's picture alone. Why is that? Well, I'm an Ohio State Buckeye fan. For those of you who don't know that is a college football team. The guy in the dating profile is a Michigan fan. Something you need to know is that Michigan and Ohio are big rivals so that was all ready a turn off. Then I got to read his profile and it just got even worse. Let's break it down.

The guy who Mark is posing with immediately became my best friend without even knowing it because his shirt is just hilarious. There is always a big rivalry game between the two colleges near the end of the season and Ohio has won every single game since 2012 keeping the winning streak alive. He knows what he is about and is going places. The fact that Mark is from Cleveland and yet is a Michigan fan just seems like betrayal. Anyways, that is enough about Ohio State. Onto the rest of this profile.

Why is 100 proof liquor important to you Mark? Do you like drinking it? Is it the only thing you drink so that means if you date a girl she has to drink it to? Are you not willing to drop any money on something else? I guess this just confuses me too much. I get if you have a drink preference that is totally fine. I don't know why it would matter what your significant other liked something else or something different. Wouldn't that be a good thing? That means even more for you!

A gambling problem doesn't sound like the thing to have. Is this something you suffer from as well Mark? Would you like us to gamble and go into debt together with no money? That sounds quite exciting! How did you know that it was just what I wanted? I mean, surely this whole thing is a joke but why? I just don't get it. Is this some sort of sense of humor that just completely goes over my head? Or do any of you actually find this funny and it makes you want to message Mark? I honestly wouldn't even know how to start the conversation to have it go somewhere further.

What is considered a run in with the law? Is it just being pulled over by a cop for speeding? Or is it actually being arrested? Because if Mark is so concerned with the law I know I can easily get pulled over for speeding a lot if that is something deemed desirable. I'm not sure my insurance will appreciate all the tickets I will get though. Then again I'll be paying the bill in the end so that won't be fun for me.

Maybe I could be like my friend and have a lengthy record of run ins with the law because I have a relative who is a police officer. Surely it can be like that funny video of the girl saying that she's pulled over all the time for minor things. It turns out that the cop who has pulled her over is her dad checking in and asking if she's doing all right. Now that is cute and funny.

What do you all think of Mark? I know I have been a little harsh in regards to which football team he's chosen to champion but the profile is a complete joke as far as I'm concerned. There's nothing about it that makes me interested in the slightest. What do you all think? Would you swipe left or swipe right and like him? Let me know what you think in the comments below. (:

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