Sunday, December 13, 2020

Tinder - Christmas Ham

I honestly don't feel like the bios on dating apps are getting any better, nor are the pictures. If anything they are further proving that some guys really do just want to stay alone. That or they're just trying to attract who are just as weird as they are. I feel like their level of weird is a bit much, even if they were trying to be weird or sarcastic. You'll see from the following profile that things are truly going downhill and perhaps it's just time to delete everything.


What kind of photo is this? What is Michael trying to prove? Is it to show that he is strong? Or that he is flexible? Or just that he's weird? I mean why are his shoes one? Does he want to leave random shoe prints on the wall? Because that's just weird. Also the angle of the photo makes it look like Michael is naked, which is even weirder. What prompted him to make him think that this was the photo to take and post in order to get a girl to take interest in him? Also what is that black cylinder in the background? A fan? And why does he have three containers of... I don't even know what on his sink? It seems a bit much but whatever. Michael is really catching my attention for all the wrong reasons.

I do not want Michael to be my Christmas ham or anyone else's because that's just a disturbing image. Even with what little I can see from this strange photo why would I waste pineapple rings by putting them on him? And glazing his stomach? That just seems weird. Does he want to be thrown in an oven as if he is in Hansel and Gretel and I'm the witch who throws him in? I just... I can't with this guys. I don't want to understand and I don't think I ever will.

The only part of this bio that makes sense is him saying to smoke weed with him. Easy enough to decipher that but maybe that can explain his photo. He thought this made him look like Spiderman after smoking a bit. Or some other superhero or character I'm unaware of. Honestly though I don't need this in my life and if this is what the dating apps have to offer I'm reading to delete.

What do you all think of Michael? Are you at all tempted to make him your Christmas ham? Or do you just want to get with him to smoke some weed? I mean, I know plenty of people who get together with someone just to smoke or drink together because it's "free" in their opinion. Whatever though. I think I just need to stop with the apps. Let me know what you think in the comments down below. (:


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