Saturday, August 26, 2017

Tinder - Poor Perfect Pen

I don't think I can justify many bios created by the guys on dating apps anymore. I truly don't understand why it is so hard to share interests or hobbies. It would seem guys write the first things that come to mind that they think make them attractive. As we've seen plenty of times before they are quite full of it and make fools of themselves. Feeling bad isn't even a reaction to it anymore, instead it's just a feeling of disappointment. I sound like a parent saying that don't I? Anyways, Sarah found our poor perfect pen today!

I feel like it's stupid for a guy or girl to say they like to flirt. That sounds more like a defense mechanism to explain why someone is always talking to a person of the opposite (or same) sex that is often mistaken for a sign of cheating. It's nice to have conversations with people but to say that you're always flirting with people isn't exactly a turn on. Anyone who has to say that they are funny isn't necessarily funny. It seems like he's trying to float his own ego. Nice way to end your sentence of being funny and semi good looking. It would appear that you don't have much in the way of brains because you can't end your sentence.

I get that not every guy loves being in the outdoors with hunting, camping, hiking, climbing, and all that other fun stuff. Just say what you do like. You don't have to sound fancy by saying you like air conditioning and the modern comforts of life. That makes you sound like one of those high school girls in the movies that only stays at home and is glued to technology because nature is dangerous. I guess this guy can't say that he doesn't like the outdoors because that would suddenly make him less manly. Not that he's proven to be a very macho man in the first place.

What are bio books? Biology? Biography? There is quite a difference. Especially when you think about all the biographical books there are because reading about some people would prove interesting but others would be an immediate turn off. His grasp of sentence structure is here to hurt me again. Say Bio(logy or graphy) books, pizza, and tacos are my favorite things. It's not that hard. String together an actual sentence about yourself. The Oxford comma is your friend. Utilize it.

What about a brunette woman? Are you interested in one? Why did you end your sentence in a parenthesis? You didn't have a parenthesis in the first place. What belongs there? He obviously doesn't understand how parenthesis work. He even threw in the random capital It's just because he struggles with grammar. If you prefer a brunette then hopefully you only swipe right on them. If he's not above the other hair colors though then why mention it? He's just trying to be picky without seeming too picky because he'll accept anyone at first.

If you have defined thoughts on religion and politics why don't you briefly share them instead of making me wonder just how crazy you are? I've done nothing to deserve having to suffer through bringing up a conversation on such a topic. Get to the point and say what you think. It's nice he doesn't judge, although I highly doubt that, but HE USED THE WRONG THERE. It's "to each their own" because there is a place. I can't win with this guy. No Oxford comma, no grasp on parenthesis, unable to punctuate at the end of a sentence, and unaware of the correct way to use there/their/they're.

All the random spaces after the periods (or lack of periods) is really bothering me at this point. Were you just so unsure of what to type you kept hitting the space bar? Perhaps he was thinking that if he took up more space girls would be more inclined to read his bio because he actually had something interesting to say. Sadly that isn't the case as we've all discovered. I don't know about any of you but I wouldn't want to have arguments and debates with my boyfriend/significant other. I understand having different opinions but to have a debate all the time doesn't sound enjoyable. To me it seems like this guy would just come up with something random to debate all the time and I don't want to deal with that nonsense.

My dude, you are typing stupid shit right now that you are making me read. Certainly that means you say stupid shit all the time so you better be prepared to deal with others who do the same. They say you often attract people similar to yourself don't they because I'm certain no one with a brain would want to have a conversation with you. This guy must run a failing business if he's poor or he's trying out a get rich quick scheme and it hasn't quite paid off yet as he's hoped. I'm surprised this guy doesn't have a penis picture to prove he has a perfect penis. The fact that he states he's been told such a thing quite a lot is a pathetic attempt at seeming better than he is. Once again he's trying to inflate his ego.

I seriously can't take this guy seriously. He's hurting me both physically and emotionally by making me read this. I can easily say that I would swipe left on him and cross my fingers that he never comes up in my feed again. What do all of you think? Is anything about this profile attractive? Does it interest you that he is poor but has a perfect penis? Let me know what you think in the comments below. (:

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