Coffee Meets Bagel - My Therapist Said

Don't ask me why but I opened the dating apps again! Ok, I should clarify. I opened ONE dating app again and it's Coffee Meets Bagel. I did this around Valentine's Day just out of curiosity to see who was on the apps and now I've been swiping and seeing what happens because there were a ton of matches and possibilities. I know there were a ton of people online because of Valentine's Day and I guess everyone was so worried about being single or alone but not me! I was just curious since I got an email saying they usually saw a big spike around that time and thought why not? So I matched with a guy who we will call Bailey and it didn't really go well from there. 

Tinder - Red Flag Beard

I think I've been talking about red flags a lot on Twitter thanks to 90 Day Fiancé and now the new season of Love is Blind. I mean, some people just have so many that I can't even imagine why someone would agree to even meet them, let alone date them. It's just too much for me. I know how to run when I see a red flag. There's no fixing it. Today we have a profile where Alex tells us all about his own red flags.

Coffee Meets Bagel - Kinks and Cuddles

It's been a while since I swiped along Coffee Meets Bagel but when I did finally decide to open up the app I was a bit surprised by what I found. I'm use to some pretty tame profiles, especially because you don't get endless swiping. You only get a few profiles to look at every 24 hours. When I came cross Mitch though I was quite surprised by his selection for his photo. First impressions matter, but now I just want to scrub my eyes and my brain. Let me show you what I'm talking about, but you've been warned.

Tinder - Limited Edition

I know when I hear the word limited edition it means that it is something so rare and valuable that it has to be experienced or seen. That's what makes it more appealing, right? Like a limited edition car or trading card comes to mind for me but to each their own, right? So when I saw some guy put on their profile that they had something limited edition I thought maybe it would actually be something worthwhile, but boy was I wrong. 

Fuck Marry Kill

Wow. It's been a minute since my last post. I would apologize, but 🤷 life. I think that's a good enough excuse. Plus I haven't been swiping on the apps as much just because it's been too tedious and I have been busy with work so no time to entertain trying to plan dates or replying to stupid messages. You know the ones I'm talking about. Maybe I'll start swiping more now that I have a bestie who is also currently swiping and it's fun to have someone to talk about these crazy profiles with. Anyway, let's get on to today's post. I was hanging out with a friend and met a friend of hers. We spoke for maybe ten minutes before I left. A week later she informed me that he wanted to ask me out. Shocking, I know. Let's get to it.

Tinder - Captive in a Hole

Sometimes on the dating apps, I'm amazed by the profiles that one can come across. I feel this entire blog is filled with plenty of profiles that really make me go, "Wow, this is what I have to choose from?" If anything it helps to solidify that being single isn't that bad. For some reason I feel like I've seen them all, but then of course someone comes along that has a profile that really makes you pause and think. 

IG - Domt tell

Well it's been a minute, hasn't it? Things have been a little busy for me because I've gone back to school in a sense to get certified so I can get a pay raise but enough about me. You never know who you're going to have message you on social media. I guess I just tend to ignore and know that a DM from someone I don't follow isn't worth my time. That of course doesn't prevent them from happening but I can at least filter through them for what's a requested message. Anyway, the following DM will show you just how stupid some people are.  

Argentine Loverboy Part 2

Did you think we were done with my loverboy? I mean, I know I did. I haven't seen the guy in person for 3 years now? Or is it more than that? Sorry everyone, but time isn't real during COVID. If you forgot about the Argentina Hunger Games you can play catch up by reading about it here or if you just want the recap for the last messages from George in 2020 you can read them here. Anyway, this saga continues because of George and his persistence. I just can't win with him, you know? Let's get to it.

Coffee Meets Bagel - Lost Jesus

You know how some people just don't seem to be on the right kind of dating app? I mean, some people aren't looking for something long term or serious and yet they're on an app that is all about that. Or vice versa if you will. I feel like they're just wasting people's time by being on the app that isn't going to cater to what they're after. There's literally a dating app all about dating farmers so surely there are plenty more for each of those specifics that people are looking into. Today's guy probably should just try Christian Mingle but let's get into it.

Coffee Meets Bagel - Emotional Baggage

Well today we have a profile that clearly serves to confuse me. Maybe some of you will understand it but I just don't get it. Do guys just think their ab pictures will overshadow everything else that is listed in their profile? If that was the case why do they even bother writing in anything to fill out their profile? Or maybe they're just testing the potential matches to see what will and won't get them attention. Anyway, let's get to the profile.